Then and Now
by Envy911
Summary: A lot of things have changed between us since I started here. And I wouldn’t change any of them if I had the chance. I know you wouldn’t either. A story told from Kaku's point of view about his relationship with Lucci. Strongly implied scenes.


a/n: this suddenly just came to me—at like 10:00 pm—and I had to write it. Hope you enjoy; reviews/critiques are encouraged and appreciated.  
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You used to be so hesitant; so careful with how you treated and handled me. Like you thought I was going to run away or accuse you of some great molestation. Like I would call you on being the predator your Devil Fruit makes you out to be. I can feel that predator working its way to the surface now. The last bite to my ribs was harder and makes me take in a sharp breath.

Hesitant, you sure aren't that now. You move with confidence that has been built up over my years as your partner. You don't see me as some little kid anymore; that's how everyone saw me when I first started working with CP9. But then again I was only sixteen when I started out.

I remember my first day. Jyabura was such a prick. Teasing and trying to pick fights with me, back then he could have beaten me to a bloody pulp. But you never let him. A moan passes over my lips when one of your hands tightens on my hip moving down to my thigh.

It confused me the way you defended me because everyone said that you were a heartless bastard that didn't care about anyone. It had shocked me to see your power; how you had thrown Jyabura through a wall for punching me once. You control that power so well, like right now how your hands are firm over my body but not hurting me.

You had stuck close to me even though you thought I didn't notice. Hovering, keeping an eye out for me. I had found it so annoying. Like I find the way you are teasing me with your tongue annoying, light little flicks that stimulate but aren't substantial enough to bring completion.

Then after the first few months you had gotten more aggressive. Made your interest in me much more noticeable. It wasn't until are first mission alone together—about a year after I joined— that you made a real move on me. You're moving now too, it hurts but feels so good at the same time.

Not like that first time. I know you tried to be careful but it had hurt like hell; physically and emotionally, because you had spent the rest of our mission seeming to avoid me as much as possible. I realize now that it was because it had been like a first for you too; not your first time—like me—but your first time with someone who you wanted to stay. More than just a one night stand.

I moan louder now; god I would have killed you before I let what we have be just a one night stand. Things had gotten better after a while you were still overly cautious about anything intimate; like you thought I would turn you away. My hands dig into your sweat slicked back as you hit something inside of me; who in their right mind would turn a man like you away?

Then came Water 7 and things had gotten harder. All because of one person: Paulie. It was my fault really; I thought you were interested in him, now that I look back on it I see I was an idiot for assuming that. But I had still been relatively green when we got sent on that mission, and had taken you false friendship with the blonde as something more.

Right now I need more. I change my grip to your shoulders and turn us over; I'm on top of you now. I remember walking in on you and Paulie once, in the restroom at Blueno's bar. You had both been on the floor he was on top of you, it made me mad. I had run over, picked Paulie up by his shirt and slammed him into the wall; if you hadn't stopped me I would have put a Shigan through his forehead.

You told me he was drunk and had pulled you down with him when he fell; it was a good thing he had been so drunk or else my actions—had he remembered them—could have blown our cover. We delivered him to the other foreman before taking our leave. When we got back to your apartment you were smiling at me. Said you were curious as to why it had bothered me so much; seeing him on top of you.

I love it when I'm on top like I am now; rocking down hard on to your member. You moan and a smile down at you. I love it when you smile as rare an occasion as it is. You make me smile all the time even though you don't know it. Like when you had told me you loved me. Of course you hadn't said it quite like that. It had been more discrete, simply 'you mean more to me than anyone else I have ever known'. I know that's the closest to an actual I love you I'll get, but it's good enough.

I couldn't stop smiling after you said it, and Jyabura had asked me why I was grinning like an idiot. I had promptly told him to shut the fuck of before going back to being happy. I'm exceedingly happy now as well; basking calmly in the afterglow next to you. You're relaxed too. It hadn't been that way at first; you were tense because you weren't used to staying with someone once things were through.

At first that always made me feel like I had done something wrong. Like I hadn't been good enough, but you didn't want to say anything. I know otherwise now. Not only from your ability to relax but from the compliments you pay me for some of the things I did to pleasure you. It makes me smile to think that I make you happy.

A lot of things have changed between us since I started here. And I wouldn't change any of them if I had the chance. I know you wouldn't either.

end

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a/n: hope it wasn't too confusing or anything. I've never written in first person before and the mix of past and present was new too; also I wrote it in like an hour so if you catch any mistakes that I didn't please inform me. Tell me what you thought overall; it would be very much appreciated if you did.


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